Can dreams die?

Everybody has dreams. Even a cynic like me has dreams sometimes.

Dreams don't always come true, but it's been known to happen sometimes. It's not that my dreams are so unfeasible - I don't dream about becoming the president of the United States or walking on Neptune. I'm not really too much of a dreamer. Well, I dream of Japan apologizing to China, Chinese people becoming more civilized, of scientists coming up with emission-free technologies, an end to war and hunger, etc., but that stuff is beyond my control.


My only dreams, my real dreams and not my silly or unattainable ones, are to write for a living; and to meet, fall in love with, and spend the rest of my life with the girl of my dreams.


A little while ago, I met and fell deeply in love with the girl of my dreams, and she fell deeply in love with me. Life was so idyllic then.

Not long after starting to live this dream of mine, I was suddenly awakened from it. I still stubbornly refuse to believe that it was all just a dream.

The pain has not subsided, and I'm still in disbelief. I have to face reality, but as much as I want to move on, it's not something I can achieve at will. Believe me, I want to move on almost as much as I want to re-live my dream. Actually, my new dream is to re-live my old dream. I dream that in a few days, or a few weeks, or a few months, or perhaps even a few years, we will be together again.


If you knew what I've been up to lately, then none of you would ever say that I haven't done enough to try to win her back. And I do so at the risk of losing my friendship with her, which is very precious to me. I do so at the risk of rendering the memories I've given her meaningless, and these memories mean so very much to her. I can't and won't let either of these things happen.

Even though she has let it slip that she will probably never stop loving me for as long as she will live and that she actually does want to be with me, her conviction in her decision is so strong and her reasons for making this decision in the first place are so compelling that she feels she must sacrifice our happiness and our love.

I've even asked her silly things such as, "If we are told that the world will end in 5 years, would you spend the rest of your life with me, since all that stuff won't matter anymore?" And she said yes. I've wished and wished and wished that the world would end in 5 years.


I have been told to forget about my dream. To expect that it won't happen. To accept that it will never happen.

Goals can be unfulfilled, we can fall short of targets, and promises are not always kept. Our beliefs can change, our tastes change, and our desires change.

But can we kill our dreams?